A thought pops in your mind and suddenly…you’re obsessing about it. Your mind is consumed by an endless amount of ‘what ifs,’ dreadful outcomes, and the feeling that you have absolutely no control. Sound familiar? Sure, we all mull over events or stressors from time to time, but a true overthinker understands the anxious feeling of not being able to shut off their mind. A simple event, meeting, or experience becomes something to dissect, ponder, and indefinitely chew on.
“I wonder if they think I’m obnoxious.”
“It seems like she was mad at me. I bet she is. It’s probably because I said *xyz.* She probably misunderstood what I meant. I need to address it the next time I see her.”
“I’m going to choke tomorrow when I give that presentation. I just know I am. I remember the last time I gave a presentation and it was horrific. This time will be no different.”
Overthinking is a draining habit that can take a toll on your body and lead to all kinds of different health issues. That’s why it’s so important to identify your overthinking tendency and work on putting an end to it ASAP.
Two Forms of Overthinking
There are actually two forms of overthinking. One is deliberating on past events while, of course, the other is worrying about future events. Both equally unhealthy.
Deliberating on Past Events
This form of overthinking typically results in you:
- Reliving embarrassing moments and/or mistakes.
- Replaying past events or encounters and creating stories in your mind about what happened.
- Assuming other people are sending you hidden meanings by their words or actions.
- Rehashing events, encounters, and conversations.
- Unable to shut off your brain.
- Repeatedly thinking you ‘should have’ or ‘shouldn’t have’ done or said something.
This form of overthinking typically leads to feelings of shame and regret while increasing insecurities and anxiety. Overthinking past events can also result in people residing in a state of isolation to avoid possible future embarrassment or mistakes, which can lead to anxiety and/or depression.
Worrying About Future Events
Overthinking past events generally leads people to overthink and worry about future events as well, so you see, it can turn into a vicious cycle.
This form of overthinking typically results in you:
- Asking yourself ‘what if’ questions.
- Concocting worst-case scenarios.
- Lamenting over things out of your control.
Worrying about the future commonly results in Analysis Paralysis. The name kind of speaks for itself. Analysis Paralysis is when someone overthinks and analyzes so much about something that they end up never doing anything.
Think of it like this—you want to start a new hobby, but get so caught up in analyzing every detail, because you want to do it perfectly, that you end up never even starting. You become paralyzed to begin because you’re stuck analyzing every detail of it all. What a bummer. Instead of learning as you go, you never even began and now you have nothing to show for all that time.
Both Forms
What both forms have in common is that they consist of stories we make up in our minds. By deliberating on past events, we replay every lived detail and shine a skewed, negative light on it all. Instead of letting a happy event be remembered that way, we interpret it differently when we relive it in our mind. And instead of thinking of how well something might go in the future, we conjure up how terribly it might go instead. What a terrible way to go through life!
How to Stop Overthinking
Now that we’ve thoroughly gone over what a bad habit overthinking is, let’s discuss some ways we can stop the madness. Below are 7 ways to stop overthinking:
1.) Practice Self-Awareness
Practicing self-awareness is one of the greatest things we can do for ourselves. It requires the intentionality of your thoughts and actions and will change your life for the better.
Instead of letting your thoughts run wild, decide to capture them. We have control over what we think about, so when we practice self-awareness we’re able to recognize when we’re overthinking and put a stop to it. Our thoughts easily change our outlook and attitude, so that’s why it’s crucial that we don’t allow ourselves to go into a downward spiral of overthinking and worrying.
Recognizing when you’re overthinking, acknowledging it, and pivoting your thoughts is the first step in putting a halt to the ugly habit.
2.) Challenge Your Thoughts
Now that you’ve recognized that you’re overthinking, decide to challenge and change those thoughts. Instead of deliberating over the past for hours on end, intentionally set aside 10 or so minutes of self-reflection. Decide what you should’ve done/said, learn from it, and move on. Don’t pick apart every detail to try and find an issue. Reflect, learn, move on.
In addition, instead of worrying about the future, think of a way you could solve that upcoming problem. Worrying and making up possible stories might make you feel prepared, but it will only cause anxiety. If there is an upcoming problem, transition into problem-solving mode, and then move on. Creating stories and worrying for hours is a waste of time.
3.) Consider the Worst
One great way to put overthinking to a halt is to think of the worst thing that could happen and come up with a plan on what you would do if that were to happen.
Although thinking of the worst can get out of hand and send you into a downward spiral, commit to only thinking of THE worst-case scenario, create an actionable solution if it happens, and move on with the confidence that you’re prepared.
4.) Imagine It’s a Friend’s Situation
Anytime we are in a situation, we tend to escalate it and make it much larger and dramatic than if someone else were going through it. If a friend was overthinking a situation, we would instantly talk them down and tell them that ‘it’s no big deal.’ It’s different when we’re the one overthinking though.
So, imagine it isn’t you in the situation, but rather a friend. This little exercise will likely change your perspective, allow you to see that whatever it is you’re overthinking isn’t a big deal after all.
5.) Remember No One is Perfect
We all have insecurities and we all make mistakes. The quicker we learn that the easier life will be and the more overthinking about our mistakes will become a distant memory. Fretting over every embarrassing thing you’ve ever done or said is a waste because it’s already done, and stressing over a potential mess up will more than likely just increase your chances of it happening. Relax in the fact that everyone messes up and has embarrassing moments.
6.) Find a Healthy Distraction
If you’re REALLY struggling to stop overthinking about something, find a healthy distraction
- Read
- Write
- Doodle
- Spend time with family
- Watch a how-to video on YouTube
- Learn a new hobby
- Spend time in nature
- etc.
7.) Remember That You’re Not Alone
When you have an overthinking spell, maybe Google the problem you’re dealing with to remind yourself that you aren’t alone. Out of everyone in the world, you will certainly find someone else dealing with the same thing you are. Sometimes all it takes to calm your overthinking is to just know you’re not alone.
In Conclusion
When it comes to overthinking, we often just want to be prepared and avoid looking dumb, mean, ill-prepared, etc. Often, the most compassionate, friendliest, most prepared people are the ones that are prone to overthinking. That says so much in itself and should be a great indication that you have no need to worry about most of the things you’re worried about.
Although overthinking is second-nature to many of us, it can be overcome with persistence. After all, overthinking is just making up stories in your mind and then worrying about it. Sounds pretty silly when it’s put that way doesn’t it? If you want to learn more about worrying, be sure to read this post on how you can turn your worry into worship.
In recap, how to stop overthinking:
- Practice Self-Awareness
- Challenge Your Thoughts
- Consider the Worst
- Imagine It’s A Friend’s Situation
- Remember No One is Perfect
- Find a Healthy Distraction
- Remember That You’re Not Alone
Keep this list with you to read over until these tips turn into habits. If you have any suggestions that personally work well for you, feel free to leave them in the comments!
Sarah
August 14, 2020Yesssssss!!! You are in my brain!
access
January 30, 2021A formidable share, I just given this onto a colleague who was doing a bit analysis on this. And he in fact bought me breakfast because I discovered it for him.. smile. So let me reword that: Thnx for the treat! However yeah Thnkx for spending the time to debate this, I really feel strongly about it and love studying more on this topic. If attainable, as you develop into experience, would you mind updating your weblog with more details? It is extremely useful for me. Massive thumb up for this weblog publish! Shirlee Corrie Jemie